So, you’ve heard of sexual intimacy, and it’s one of the new hot things around town, but you’re not really sure of what it means or how to achieve it? Don’t fret – as always, V for Vibes has got your back when it comes to sexual empowerment and getting you in touch with your body!

To get us started, let’s begin with the definition of sexual intimacy we’re using to write this article. Sexual intimacy is a form of a sexual encounter that allows for more than just self-satisfaction and gratification and does not use sex as a detached, closed-off form of interacting with others, particularly your partners. 

Now that we know what sexual intimacy is not, let’s talk about what it really is. Sexual intimacy is when your partners know how, when, and where you like to be touched, and you know the same about them. You’re able to tell very quickly in sexual encounters whether your partner is enjoying what is being done to them and whether you’re having a good time, too, through cultivating sexual intimacy with your partner. 

Of course, this form of intimacy requires all other forms of it, too – you can’t just have sexual intimacy without creating the space for emotional, spiritual, intellectual, and experiential intimacy with your partner. 

Much like all other forms, this requires work and effort, and above everything else, care for your partner and their wants and needs. 

Having intimate sex means that you’re taking into account all of your partner’s needs and desires, and they are doing the same for you – it becomes much more about pleasure and love and care instead of being about just sex. This can be great, especially for people in long-term relationships who have been together for a while or plan on being together for much longer, as this can increase your libido, reduce stress, and make you feel very good about yourself and the relationship. 

How to Build Sexual Intimacy with your Partner

You can start off small when working towards building sexual intimacy with your partner – things like figuring out what feels good and what doesn’t simply in terms of touch and pressure can be really good to get you started! 

If you’re someone who is usually sexually intimate with their partners and already knows what feels good and what doesn’t, feel free to communicate it to your partner so that they can know, too. Of course, this doesn’t mean that you can’t discover new things that you or your partner are into or like. It is just that this will be a great foundation to lay down in your relationship while building sexual intimacy. 

Like we’ve mentioned in our other articles about the different forms of intimacy, you will need to foster enough emotional, spiritual, intellectual, and experiential intimacy between you and your partner well before you dive into sexual intimacy. The reasons for this are simple. 

With emotional and intellectual intimacy already established, you and your partner can openly talk about love, emotions, thoughts, and feelings without feeling judged or fearing the consequences. You can share your ideas honestly and work towards having new experiences together, which can lead to experiential intimacy. 

When you’re connected spiritually, you also learn how to love the differences that both of you bring to the relationship. All of these can lead to you feeling more accepted, and your partner can feel more loved, resulting in more intimate sex than ever before! 

Not just that, but science proves the release of feel-good hormones like serotonin and oxytocin when you and your partner display love and affection along with care for each other. This can make you feel more valued, improve your self-esteem and confidence, and can make you feel more in touch with your body, leading to an increased libido and more fun sexual encounters! 

Physical intimacy can change the way you live your life, and it is for the better if you’re feeling more loved and appreciated! 

Another key step in building sexual intimacy is to ask, always. Ask your partner what they like done to them and whether they would like to change anything up about the way you have sex in the present moment. Listen closely and pay attention to what they say – and finally, implement the changes they ask for. Be more giving, and you will receive in return in a relationship with sexual intimacy. This is a relationship where you put pleasure first, for both of you, if done right.

Why Sexual Intimacy Matters

Sexual intimacy is important for a number of reasons, not just for better sex. If you are someone with body image issues, or your partner struggles with accepting themselves as they are, sexual intimacy can turn their world around when they feel loved and accepted by their partner. 

It is also important to fully feel the intensity of sexual intimacy to allow yourself to feel the feel-good hormones we talked about earlier; this can lead to elevated moods and to more comfort being created in your relationship. 

Sexual intimacy shows your partner that you care, simply put. That you’re invested in their pleasure, the way you are in your own, and that you’re willing to make an effort to make them happy. Who doesn’t want that? That plus sex is one hell of a bonus if you ask us! 

Sexual intimacy can lead to a more meaningful and loving relationship where each partner feels loved and cared for. This can take the pressure off during sex, and that’s the best kind of foreplay to get you in the mood. 

Sex can become a fun activity that doesn’t necessarily become all about the performance or what it looks like to anyone else – as long as you and your partner are enjoying what you do and can talk comfortably about it, that’s all that matters. 

Examples of Sexual Intimacy 

Sexual intimacy can take many forms, including emotional, intellectual, spiritual, and experiential kinds of intimacy. If you’re looking to have intimate sex, you should begin by talking to your partner about what feels good for you and asking them the same questions.

Pay attention and listen to what they’re saying so that you can practice the things they ask you to do when you two do engage in sexual activities. Give more time to foreplay, and don’t skip out on the talking – feel free to laugh and have a good time as you and your partner both dive into sex. 

Think of fun scenarios you can engage in, especially when you and your partner run into a routine of doing the same thing over and over again. Try new things like roleplay, or butt plugs, or sex toys. Pick from a wide variety in our Shop if you’d like to find something you haven’t tried before but would want to find out more about. 

Get a remote control vibrator if you’re ready to take the sexual intimacy to the next level. Give your partner complete control over what happens to you and your body as you go about your day, should you dare to use your remote control vibrator in public– that level of trust and commitment can only come when a high level of sexual intimacy is achieved. And that high level of sexual intimacy is exactly what we’re hoping you’ll try to work on with your partner. 

It can be fun, liberating, and very empowering to feel intimate during sex – and we hope that this works out for you and your partner!

Remember to take this journey to more sexual intimacy nice and slow, as nothing happens overnight, and to always practice love, patience, and open communication. More intimate sex is all but guaranteed to follow.