If you have ever heard or wondered about what is edging, or teasing, or even sometimes called peaking, you’re in the right place to find out! We at V for Vibes have put together a comprehensive list of definitions, instructions, and benefits of this widely talked about practice called edging, which some claim is great for rekindling feelings of sexual tension and taking your orgasm to the next level.
As always, you’ll have to keep an open mind, be mindful and present, and communicate with your partner to try this sexual technique, or if you’re on your own, pay attention to your body! Trust us; there’s no one who knows your body better than you – so pay close attention and listen to what it needs and how it responds.
So what is edging?
‘Edging’ refers to reaching the metaphorical “edge” in any sexual encounter, that is, building up the tension in your body and letting it get to the point right before you orgasm, then suddenly slowing down or stopping, which isn’t quite the same thing as a ruined orgasm, which relates more to BDSM. Sounds odd, right? Why would anyone want to stop right before they orgasm?
Studies have proven that edging heightens the experience of an orgasm, allowing it to be felt deeper in the body and at a higher intensity and allows for a lot of anticipation and build-up, which takes the pressure off having to orgasm. We know it sounds startling to think about this, but let’s put it this way. Visualize the way your body experiences sexual encounters – there are four stages:
1. The Build Up or Rising Tension:
This is where you and your partner will set the mood, or if you’ve chosen to go solo, light a few candles, get out your favorite sex toy and dim the lights to make this the perfect experience for yourself. Play some tunes, and really take your time building up to any actual sexual contact. Play around with the idea of anticipation and tension, explore erogenous zones and get your partner aroused enough to feel like they’re ready to take it further.
1. The Plateau:
The next stage in edging is what experts call the “plateau,” and this is because once you or your partner are aroused, you will continue to feel that ‘feel-good’ feeling in your body for a little while before it progresses. Take your time at this stage trying to explore and figure out what works for you and what doesn’t, and remember, there is no wrong step as long as it’s all done with consent. Don’t be afraid to try new things like different materials and textures to play with the sensual vibes in the bedroom, or get out your kinkiest toys to really push your boundaries. Here, you might feel the urge to take things up a notch and really rush to the orgasm part of your sexual encounter, but take our word for it – the best way to savor edging is to take it slow and really let your partner get fully worked up. Allow them, or yourself if you’re goin’ solo, to feel that sexual tension build up in every part of your body and in every muscle. Slow down, or maybe even think of stopping for 30 seconds before you continue, just so your body can catch a break and feel the tension rise even higher than it did before you stopped.
2. The Orgasm:
Finally, in this chain of events is the stage called the orgasm, which is pretty self-explanatory. Allowing yourself that 30-second break between the rising tension and orgasming lets your body experience the full potential of what is known as a full-body orgasm, one that is felt throughout the body in vibrations. Sounds great? There’s more! The orgasm can have sensual and even energetic vibes where each part of your body will respond to the pleasure it is receiving in this process of edging, making this a never seen before experience for you and your partner! Feel your orgasm deep in your core, allowing it to be a stimulating experience not just for your body but for your mind and soul, too, and let this process bring you closer and feel more connected to your partner through this blissful sexual intimacy.
4. The Resolution:
This brings us to the next and final stage in this chain of edging – the resolution. This part of the sexual encounter is right after you orgasm and after your muscles ease up and return to their regular state. This can be euphoric for some people, and for others, it can be increasingly calming and soothing more than anything else before. This is also because the exhaustion that kicks in right after one hits the Big O comes from the way your muscles sneak in a mini-workout during sex, and they feel good hormones released after sex allows for a peaceful sleep that follows!
Now that we’ve discussed the various stages of edging, let’s move towards the benefits of edging, which are plenty, studies suggest. Apart from the physical benefits, edging can also stimulate a lot of receptors in your body and allow you to feel more in touch with your own body and your partner’s if they’re involved! Along with being one incredible way to rekindle the spark in a long-term relationship, it can also help you discover new sensations that excite and arouse you. There’s never a better time for growth than when you’re feeling your best and ready to have sexual encounters, and learning more about your body will not only allow you to be more empowered and sexually confident in your daily life, but it will also be a source of self-esteem boost and a mood lifter that is required every now and then.
Here are some do’s and don’ts of edging if you’re feeling ready and all prepared to try it out on your own or with a partner:
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Do take your time! Stop worrying about what it looks like when you do orgasm and let your body fully relax before you step into something new and experience the mind-blowing effects of edging. Adding more pressure to the situation will only push the orgasm further back and block your chances of finally finishing with all your glory – edging can be a quick in-between stage that allows your body to take a moment to fully feel the extent of stimulation you are receiving before finishing.
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Don’t rush it! When you rush and worry, your chances of getting to an orgasm are significantly lower and decrease even further when you fixate on it. One of the easiest ways vagina-owners can reach orgasm is by taking the “edge” off with edging and letting your body fully feel the force of what is being stimulated and when.
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Do stay mindful of what you’re experiencing and remember to communicate with your partner about your needs and wants – nobody has the power to read minds, so don’t make them guess! Tell them what you’re into and what you’re not into and take it from there, really letting the tension build up in your body before moving on to the next big thing in your sexual encounter. Remember to check in with your partner regularly if you are trying this for the first time and do what feels good for you and them.