Sex

Spank This! The Ultimate Guide to Spanking Sex

May 6, 2021

We all love a little smack on the butt when we’re busy getting it on. The hurt-so-good, like it a little rough type of vibe that spanking sex brings about an alluring aspect of erotic play. 

And sure, a simple little spanking here and there is a straightforward, effective, and rather fun means of adding a little flair to your sex life. But there’s actually a lot more that goes into spanking than you first might think, as there exists both a plethora of ways in which you can carry out the act of spanking and different tools of the trade to utilize with this kinky act. 

If you want to become a master of spanking, then you’ve come to the right place, as we’re going to showcase a handful of different spanking methodologies for you to try, and the best ways for you to carry out such a roughly playful act. 

Why Do People Enjoy Spanking Sex?

Spanking sex is adored by those who know the joys derived from the pain of a spank. As an integrated part of the BDSM world, spanking is the perfect means to punish a submissive in a manner that isn’t too serious and still is fun, but without crossing any lines. 

When practicing intimacy, the dominant can control the submissive behaviors and punish the negative behaviors, through the varying forms of spanking, including the use of BDSM-centered sex toys like a good old-fashioned leather whip!

And even couples who would not consider themselves active participants of BDSM still enjoy the masochistic characteristic of spanking. It’s always nice to allow one partner to take a little bit of control, and to vanilla couples, a little bit of pain might be exactly what they need to make up for some bratty or rude behavior that occurred during the day. 

Punishment through sex is a highly suggested way to derive positivity out of negative feelings, and spanking is a simple way to do so. Instead of going home and arguing until the sun goes down, why not express oneself through wildly erotic sex, using spanking and similar means as a method to express your feelings. Chances are, when you’re all wrapped up with your feel-good version of couples therapy, you’ll forget why you were even mad in the first place!

 

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How to Practice Spanking Sex

As we said, there’s a bunch of different ways to practice spanking sex and a bunch of different toys to help you do so, so if you need a little direction, we got ya covered!

Light Spanking

A light spank isn’t a spanking that is done out of pure punishment for bad behavior. Instead, a light spanking is a lighthearted way to showcase just a little bit of kink to your sex and to give your partner a rather invigorating little surprise. 

You’re not bruising their buttocks, and instead, you’re just having a little fun with their netherregions, using your hand as a device to instill a rather fun form of punishment, not serious punishment

To practice light spanking, the classic palm to bum is always the best place to start. Positions that expose the butt, such as doggy style, and performing light spanking while having sex (not strictly before) are the go-to for light spanking. 

Caress the skin of your partner with a light spank of your palm, and call her/him dirty names as you do so for added flair. Don’t go too hard, here, especially if spanking is new to you, as everyone perceives pain differently. 

Only up the intensity as you begin to understand how your partner responds to pain. 

You can add bits of role play here if you so enjoy, such as the classic teacher and student in trouble set up, and use this play as a means to further direct the fun punishment of spanking that you, at this point, want to deserve!

Severe Spanking

There’s a big difference between light spanking and severe spanking consistently practiced by those who actively partake in the world of BDSM. 

Severe spanking involves serious punishment. It hurts, and it’s really no joke. Because of this, it should take you plenty of time and practice to work up to severe spanking that is carried out as a form of genuine punishment. 

Spanking for punishment will leave the participants butt red as an apple and possibly even bruised, and is suggested for those who highly enjoy providing the pleasures of pain or for those who love receiving the pleasures of pain. 

With spanking for punishment, you’re going to need a little more than just your hands, and this can be done both before, during, and after sex, as the role of dominant and submissive often carries outside of just a bedroom setting. 

 

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Palm Spanking

If you use only your hands for serious spanking punishment, then for the painful yet alluring results you seek, make sure to consistently spank the same areas of the butt to promote the redness and pain that some enjoy. 

Whip Spanking

If you’ve never used a whip before as a form of punishment in a sexual setting, then do start with standard palm spanking first to get a feel for your partner’s pain tolerances and specific enjoyments. 

But once you feel comfortable and are looking to up the intensity, there’s no better way to do so than with a leather whip. These toys are quite literally designed for spanking, and just their presence alone creates a dominantly controlled aura to the setting of your sexuality

Your submissive will act accordingly, as the whip might just entice them to behave extra badly just so that they can feel the leather caress their skin, or extra good so that they can avoid the lustful sting. 

Paddle Spanking

Paddles spanking will provide a sensation similar to the palm, but with way more intensity. Paddles cover much more surface area than our hands, allowing you to spank nearly half the butt at the same time, and paddles also allow for more aggression in your spanking. 

Use your paddle for more than just spanking, as well. Rub it lightly down the back of your partner as they enticingly arch their back in doggy style for a tickle that feels ironically wondrous before the sting of force on their butt. Lift their chin up with the paddle so that they are forced to look you in the eyes. 

Just have fun with it, and continue exploring in regards to the unique personalities of your relationship!

Handcuff Spanking

Oh yeah, you’re really in trouble here. By forcing your partner into handcuffs, there’s no way for them to escape, and this allows for one of the most serious and kinky variations of spanking sex that exists. 

Place them in handcuffs if they do something wrong, flip them over, and spank them until you are satisfied that they have truly ‘learned their lesson’. Using handcuffs signifies dominant control to the highest extent, and you can even handcuff them up and spank them as a means of foreplay, forcing them to beg you for more. 

Just be safe, set a safeword, and work hard to understand the limits of your partner with experience. 

Spanking Sex Aftercare

Things can get wild rather quickly when you’re practicing spanking sex. Be sure to practice appropriate aftercare when you are finished. 

Talk to your partner and make sure that they are okay, both physically and emotionally. Do anything you need to do to bring them back down into reality and away from the fantasy-like land of spanking. 

Provide them some water to hydrate, make them a warm tea so that they can relax. 

If the spanking was serious, then you may even think to treat the butt with ice or a nice warm bath filled with Epsom salts. A little lotion surrounding the area never hurts. 

Just be sure that everything is completed with positivity at the forefront, and this will ensure that your relationship is being catered to in all the best of ways for healthy, enjoyable, and riveting spanking sex that brings you closer as a couple. 

 

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