When it comes to sexual pleasure and different kinds of sex, every single person is different. Intercourse is sex, of course, but it’s not the only kind of sex and sexual pleasure out there to experience! There are so many different types of sexual pleasure, some that people do not even stop to consider when they are about to get freaky and hit the bedroom (or kitchen, bathroom, living room..). It’s imperative to remember that consenting to sexual pleasure is key to enjoying that pleasure, and that all forms of sexual pleasure are valid and intricate experiences for each of us to explore and experiment with.  

We learn in sex ed, and from popular movies that show sexually charged scenes, that sexual pleasure is really just thought of in one particular way. However, sexual pleasure does not only derive itself from one act. There is a large spectrum of pleasure out there. Since desires, drive, and libidos are varied, it really just matters that the experience makes you feel good!

The sexual pleasure of erotic and erogenous stimulation

One thing to realize is that different parts of our bodies offer incredibly different sensations when it comes to sexual pleasures. The sensations and experiences that touching other parts of our bodies offer are incredibly pleasurable. Explorative touching allows for each person to discover their erogenous zones and areas, and is very erotic. It also allows you to build trust in your partner, and is great foreplay for penetrative sex. Some people are actually able to reach orgasms just through erogenous touching, such as nipple stimulation, cuddling, and breast fondling. Just do what feels good for you!

The sexual pleasure of oral stimulation

Oral sex is used to stimulate the genitals with someone’s mouth. Oral sex can be far more pleasurable sexually than other kinds of sex for some, and not stimulating enough for others. Some may love to give, but not receive, and some may love to receive but not give when it comes to oral. Oral sex is not something you can have a wrong opinion on – it is up to your personal preference and the pleasure you feel from it. Communicating with your partner what you do and don’t like will help them explore these pleasures. Though oral sex won’t lead to pregnancy, you can still contract sexually transmitted infections, also known as STIs. Dental dams and condoms are imperative to use in this situation if you don’t know each other’s status. 

Is anal sex pleasurable?

Anal sex can be enjoyed by anyone of any gender, sexual orientation, or sex. However, even though that may be the case, not everyone will enjoy or receive sexual pleasure from anal sex. If you are not comfortable with trying anal sex, it is very important that you communicate that to your partner openly. 

Anal sex does require the use of a lubricant, since the anus dow not create lubrication on its own naturally. Without lubrication, anal can be extremely painful and unpleasurable. You should also use a condom to prevent STI transmission. Pregnancy is not possible if ejaculation takes place inside of the anus.

Solo sex, or masturbation

Masturbation is still a form of sexual pleasure, even if it is just solo sex! You don’t need help or the opinions of others to validate the sexual pleasure that you feel and receive. In fact, masturbation can be the most pleasurable, because most people know their own bodies better than any other person does in terms of pleasure. You can also experiment and discover things that you may want to try or prefer, in a space with no judgment or fear of opinions. Masturbation should not be a shameful act. Whether in a relationship or single, masturbation is a healthy part of every person’s sexual experience. If you want to, or if you’re comfortable, you can also masturbate with your partner. This can involve them watching, or masturbating while watching you. It allows them to share the experience, and even learn things you may like that they don’t know about. 

Vaginal sex and its pleasure

Most people think of the penis in the vagina when it comes to sex or intercourse. However, though it may be the most sensationalized and popular, we obviously know it’s not the only kind or type of sex that exists. It’s a type of sex, of course, and is one of the only types that risks pregnancy if contraceptive methods such as barriers or oral pills aren’t used. It also allows for STI transmission, which is another reason using condoms is always a crucial step in sexual health. Surprisingly enough, it seems that only around 20 percent of all women’s orgasms actually come from the penis in vagina intercourse. In fact, clitoral stimulation appears to be one of the largest pleasure points of the vagina. With that being said, vaginal intercourse is still enjoyable and pleasurable for many, and you may be able to reach climax this way. Clitoral and G spot stimulation are often combined with vaginal sex. 

Let’s not forget about sexual pleasure toys!

Sex toys are literal pleasure devices that are in our hands, putting us in control of stimulation. Sex toys are available for all genders, sexes, and people of any and every sexual orientation. They provide incredible stimulation that can be concentrated on a specific area and doesn’t have the human aspect of getting tired. There are wands, cock rings, dildos, strap ons, and sex dolls to say the least about what’s available. If you want something, it is probably out there and available to buy. Sex toys can even be used with a partner to aid in helping you experience more pleasure and reach your desired climax. These can also be used to stimulate your partner at the same time. It is a key element to keep them clean – use a lubricant appropriate for the type of toy, and use a condom if needed as well!

Phone sex – the most underrated and least utilized sexual pleasure.

Yes, physical intimacy is amazing, but phone sex can build a bond that you didn’t know existed. It can also keep you connected when your partner is away, whether for a short or long time! Phone sex can be phenomenal in these times of social distancing, and also allows for more experimentation with scene and mood-setting together. 

With all of these forms of sexual pleasure abundantly available to you, what is your go-to?