Sex Diaries: Should I keep One?

by | Oct 25, 2021 | Sex Education | 0 comments

Sex diaries (also known as sex journals) are excellent means to document your sexual experiences, promote sexual discovery, and act as an outlet for sensual creativity. There are many reasons as to why sex diaries are highly beneficial, and you’ll soon see why keeping a sex journal is such a fantastic idea filled with many positive effects guaranteed to follow. 

There are, however, a few variations for keeping sex diaries depending on your current standing in relationships and sexual affairs, and we’ll get right into these differing aspects, answering both why and how to go about your newfound passion of journaling about sex. 

What are Sex Diaries?

To summarize, sex diaries are personal writings surrounding nearly anything related to sex, maintaining a specific focus on sexuality. Sex diaries can be many things within this definition, and a few examples of the different types include:

  1. Using a sex diary to keep track of your past sexual encounters
  2. Using a couples sex journal to document experiences together and promote shared sexual discovery
  3. Employing a sex diary as creative expression
  4. A personalized diary to document your internal feelings and to memorialize your sexual escapades. 

With this wide range of possibilities contained within each option of sex diaries, let’s get into the reasoning behind each, which one might apply to you, and some simple-to-follow advice surrounding how to keep a sex journal. 

The Sex Journal #1

Using a sex diary to keep track of your past sexual encounters is one of the first possible ways of crafting your very own sex journal. This method of journaling isn’t about creativity or documentation of your feelings to reflect on and is somewhat more of a ‘technical’ approach.

In terms of sex journal prompts, this setup includes writing about the specifics of your sexual encounters, such as who you had sex (or performed other sexual activities) with, when you had sex with them, did you use protection, etc. 

This style of sex journal is beneficial in keeping track of possible STD/STI transmissions, contacting other partners regarding transmission or pregnancy (helping to answer who may have gotten you pregnant should this be the case), and overall, as a way to keep track of your headcount for your own personal reasons. 

sex diaries

The Sex Journal #2

A couples sex journal the perfect means to enhance your shared sex life with a romantic partner. 

Let’s be honest; if you don’t put in the work to continue making sex fun and exciting, then it is easy to allow the mundane to take over. Your fulfillment, your sex drive, and your pleasure all may falter with it, and sex diaries for couples act as an excellent means to avoid precisely this. 

How so, you might ask? A couples sex journal is essentially a way for both yourself and your partner to reflect upon the varying instances of your intercourse, thus allowing you to pinpoint new experiences that you enjoyed, certain positions that did or didn’t work, kinks that you do/do not enjoy, how often you generally have sex, and any other sexual idiosyncrasies you can think of. 

This way, you open doors to endless, positive conversations about sex. For example, for a few sex journal prompts, as you write together, take note of the things you liked and answer why you liked them, such as:

  • How you felt a new sex toy did or did not promote the sensation of your experience, and if you would like to continue using this as a pleasure-inducing device together, or perhaps you would rather keep it for strictly solo self-pleasure. 
  • Did you discover a new sex position that is perfect for reaching orgasm? What was it so that you know to try it again?
  • Is there a new erogenous zone that your partner discovered that you genuinely enjoy?
  • Do you like or hate foot play? What about temperature play? Roleplay, perhaps?
  • What made you climax with such passion this time versus others?
  • Etc…

By doing this, you can better adjust the next intimate moment accordingly for higher quality sex inspired by your ability to openly and honestly communicate your pleasures, desires, and likings in the bedroom. You can also write about certain ideas that you’d like to experiment with or create unique sex games, or really anything else you can think of that will make for a sex life that is synonymous with climactic chills and endless gratification. 

the dual rose vibrator Daphne by V For Vibes

The Sex Journal #3

Of all the sex diaries, this version is the most influenced by creativity. For this version of a sex journal, you can think of it as something similar to writing your own erotic stories to thus manifest what you wish to occur within the real-life aspects of sexuality and as a means to promote sexual relief through creative expression. 

For example, for one version of this style of sex journal prompts, let’s say you have a particular kink you have been dying to try, but you are single and haven’t yet found yourself in the position to safely explore it. To some, this might cause bouts of sexual frustration! 

That need, that desire contained deep within itching at your mind, but no way of turning it into a reality, can be daunting and sit uncomfortably in your mind. 

With sex diaries focused on this form of creative expression, you can take the time to write about this kink in a way that brings your imagination to life on paper. It’s like a relief in itself- sure, you haven’t really experienced it quite yet, but you’ve manifested what it will be like when you do, you’ve given yourself a place to expel your sexual frustration, and you promote creativity surrounding your sex life that will translate into your following intercourse. 

Writing about sex and your desires is healthy, and it helps you think freely and imaginatively as your kinkiest, dirtiest, and most sexual self, which will do wonders for the future of your sex life. 

sex diaries

The Sex Journal #4

By writing sex diaries that document your internal feelings and memorialize your sexual escapades, this is like any other diary, but a hell of a lot more fun to look back on and read, and also to write. 

Our sexual endeavors often create a significant aspect of who we are as a person, and it’s vital that you can healthily reflect on past experiences to thus promote a future of sexual bliss. 

Similar to the couples sex journal, but personalized to only you (specifically if you’re single) and as your own, untouchable place to safely express yourself, you will:

Reflect on the sex during the writing stages as the words begin to flow. You will memorialize your past experiences to look back on them with a sly, sensual smile. You can identify stages of growth you are undergoing. 

As well as this, this style of sex diary will help you to pinpoint what certain lovers did that you did or didn’t like, what kinks you have found really turn you on, what type of people you realize you are attracted to, or what qualities you have found turn you off, and much more. 

If you need a few sex journal prompts for this style of writing and reflection, try:

  • Writing the story of your intercourse. After a sexual encounter, take the time to remember exactly what happened and write it down on paper as a way to bring the story to life to never forget any of the minute details that were oh-so-much fun. 
  • Write about the personality of your last partner and what you did or did not like
  • Do a diary entry about how a particular partner made you feel- did they cater to a specific type of intimacy that you really enjoyed? And how can you translate this into future interactions?
  • What do you seek from your next partner, and how can you go about getting this? 
  • Did you try anal sex for the first time? How did it go, and what could you do differently next time for more pleasure?


Quickie Fun: 10 Quickie Ideas.

Sometimes, you have limited time to have sex. But a tight schedule doesn’t mean quickie sex has to be anything less than satisfying. I know you and your partner probably have toe-curling, lip-biting quickie sex most of the time. So how can you have quickie fun and...

10 Men’s Sexual Fantasies that are More Common than you Think!

Have you ever wondered what's going on inside the mind of a man? Have you ever caught a handsome gentleman looking at you from across the bar and wished you knew what he was thinking?    We all know men to be highly imaginative and particularly inclined towards...

Is it Okay to Have Sexual Fantasies? How to Embody Your Carnal Imagination.

It's human nature to fantasize about things. You may feel particularly fulfilled when thinking of your future self becoming a famous songwriter even if you haven't played a note of music in your life. The human brain is capable of incredible feats and fantastical...

Secret Masturbation: Everything You Should Know about Undisclosed Sexual Exploration.

Listen, honey; I’m going to save you some time: you are allowed to flick your clit whenever you and how many times you want. No man should tell you what you can and can’t do to your body, especially when it comes to self-pleasure. So if your man has an issue with you...

How to Secretly Masturbate… And Not Get Caught.

Do you know how to secretly masturbate without getting caught? Heck, this is a must-have skill in 2022!   Where were you the first time you felt a surge of arousal, and you were nowhere near your room? Maybe you were with your partner on the balcony, and you felt...

Are you Into Forced Masturbation?

With so many excellent sex toys on the market these days, I think it’s safe to say that we’re all into pleasuring ourselves. But what about forced masturbation? What is it? When do you do it? Well, I’m about to tell all … What is forced masturbation? Forced...

Bathtub Bliss. Your Guide to Bathtub Masturbation.

The one thing about masturbation that will always hold true is the fact that your sexual pleasure is in your control.  You know yourself the best, both the physical and mental trigger points that instill all those lovely orgasm-inducing vibes, and with this, you can...

Everything to Know About Guided Masturbation.

For many, masturbating often brings about feelings of guilt and is a practice that some are intimidated by or not sure of how to properly pursue. Guided masturbation works magic at negating any negative emotions surrounding the subject and acts as the perfect...

How to Masturbate Longer.

When you get some one-on-one time with your clitoris, you might feel tempted to race to the end because it just feels so good. But your final orgasm can feel so much better if you draw out the process. Yes, friends, we're talking about edging yourself. What is edging?...

The Best Places to Masturbate in Public.

If you’ve been thinking of getting risky with public masturbation, we have a list of spots you can refer to when you need guidance! This list, as most things that are risky and can get you in trouble, comes with its own disclaimers and, of course, should only be used...