Have you been considering opening up your relationship with your partner to a non monogamous, open relationship? Or have you been wondering what an open relationship actually means, and what goes in to one? Only you can determine whether or not you should be in an open relationship, but the V For Vibes team has put together info and helpful tips to educate you more. There are so many pros and cons to these kinds of relationships, and everyone is different, so keep on reading to learn more.
So what exactly is an open relationship? To be textbook about it, an open relationship is a relationship where two people who are dating are not exclusive with each other, and have other partners. This can work one sided, or mutually. Basically, both parties of the relationship are openly allowed and able to have other sexual and/or romantic partners, if that’s what they’ve chosen. Some people only have one partner in that style of relationship, and some have both. While not being monogamous is a pretty basic characteristic of these relationships, there are multiple different kinds of open relationships as well. It’s not just one size fits all.
Sounds like there’s pros to this, but let’s break it down. If you are thinking about making your relationship an open one, you have to see the pros and cons, and the different aspects and responsibilities these require. The connection is much different than a standard relationship.
Monogamy - not required
Being in an open relationship is an amazing option for people who don’t believe in monogamy, have failed at being monogamous before, or simply don’t want to be monogamous, yet still want to have a meaningful, deep relationship with someone they love. By choosing to have an open relationship, you may be able to combine the best of both worlds. You can maintain your deep and meaningful relationship, while reaping the benefits of seeing other people and not cheating on your partner.
You're more honest about desires
One of the most appealing characteristics of this type of relationship is that it allows you and your partner the ability to pursue other people in a way that’s based solely on mutual respect, amazing communication, and complete honesty. While you still love or have very strong feelings for your partner, you’re able to have different needs met with other people, while being completely truthful and open with your partner. If you’re in to something sexually that they aren’t, you can fulfill that desire. If you want to experience another person, you don’t have to break up with them to have it.
You don’t experience lack of fulfillment
An amazing component of an open relationship is definitely the excitement, the thrill, and sense of adventure that it can bring. If your partner can’t satisfy all of your needs for some reason, the open relationship aspect allows you to seek those out without repercussions. People’s sex drives don’t always match, for example. Maybe your partner is pregnant and not in the mood, or you want to try BDSM and she or he doesn’t.
That said, in order to determine if an open relationship is the right choice for you and your other half, it’s also extremely important to understand the downsides of this kind of relationship.
You may be jealous
Even though an open relationship is built and based on communication, respect, and honesty, it can be hard not to experience the feelings of jealousy that come with sharing someone. You may feel threatened or intimidated by the other people your partner pursues. These feelings are the largest cause of these relationships not working out. Jealousy comes in monogamous relationships as well, but in that scenario, you’re not sharing someone else. If you have a partner who wants true commitment, they're likely to experience these feelings even more so in an open relationship due to the sharing and potential of losing you.
It won’t fix an already dying relationship
Sometimes, people choose to have an open relationship in the hopes that it’ll save a failing connection. This can actually backfire severely though. If your relationship is weak or failing, opening it up will most likely destroy it. If you want an open relationship to succeed, there has to be a strong foundation in place to support it. Otherwise, you’ll most likely not only be unsatisfied, but it will cause you to break up.
You may feel very vulnerable
Women and men can both experience vulnerability in an open relationship. You may begin to feel insecure about your body, your sex drive, or your overall look. When you’re relying on your partner to be safe, you also have to worry that he or she may not use protection, or may develop feelings for another partner. This can make you feel hurt and unsupported, which is very negative to experience. No one wants to second guess themselves, their self worth, or their partner.
So, is an open relationship right for you? If you’re considering having an open relationship, reviewing the pros and cons can assist you in making a more informed, thought out, and educated decision. It’s important to keep in mind that no two relationships are the same, and in order for any type of relationship to be long-lasting, you have to be completely open and honest with your partner today about what you actually want. Not being honest leads to cheating, lies, and hurt feelings.
Have you had an open relationship? Drop a comment below to let us know how it went!