Updated: Jan 3
Everyone remembers their first kiss, first time having sex, falling in love, and their first time using a sex toy! I remember the first time I tried bringing a sex toy in to the bedroom. I surprised my boyfriend at the time with a cock ring, and threw in a wand just for me. I thought he’d be more receptive if there was pleasure involved for both of us.
When I handed them to him, I thought he’d be surprised or embarrassed, or maybe even mad that I was handing him a dildo. Instead, he broke into the biggest smile and got incredibly excited. It was definitely the opposite of what I expected! Even though we were both unsure of how to use them, we were curious and excited. The sexual tension was building up for both of us.
They were just inexpensive, battery operated toys, probably made from the worst materials. But you know what? Those toys gave us the time of our lives that night. He had never seen me so excited, and I had never felt anything like it before. As for the cock ring, its vibrations were pretty weak, and I’ve seen much better now - but at the time, that thing rocked both of our worlds.
One thing we discovered while buying and trying more exciting, innovative toys, is that they made both of our orgasms even stronger. They also improved our sex life as a whole and helped us bond together. We were excited every time a new shape, size, or color came to the room and we trusted each other even more. We were willing to try more and more kinky experiences together!
Seeing the sex toy industry grow and improve made us feel like we needed to change things up - during foreplay and sex. Every time I brought a new box home, whether it was a wand, massage toy, or kinky dildo, it felt like the holidays. We even tried a butt plug to wear during sex and some bondage toys! These toys helped us build our relationship when he started to experience performance issues, and really opened my eyes to the world of experiencing different kinds of orgasms.
That’s why I think talking about sex toys is so healthy, not only for relationships, but people in general. It’s amazing how sometimes a wand vibrator is all it takes to overcome boredom in the bedroom! I also love being up to date with the adult industry. Any time something new is invented, I like being the first to test it, and the first to have an opinion. The best part to me though, is being able to spread the word that sex toys shouldn’t be seen as taboo. So many people enjoy intimacy and playing with their partner- so why is it wrong to help keep things fun and alive?
Almost any sex toy product can be for couples, by the way, as long as you’re both willing and able to try it. Don’t let products specifically marketed as “the best sex toys for couples” fool you. For example, my boyfriend and I both love playing with Aurora, the V For Vibes dual ended wand toy. I use the wand head to massage his balls, and he uses the other end as a classic dildo for me!
Over time, I have become a little more choosy about what materials my toys are made with. I’ve learned that jelly toys and PVC can be very unsafe, and I stick to body safe silicone or glass. These are also much easier to clean. That’s a big reason my partner and I purchase from V For Vibes - all of the toys we’ve chosen to buy are safe, high quality, and amazing. Check out their website for some fun sex toys for her (and him!).