Did you know that a lot of your arguments with your partner could be avoided if you knew their love language? Thanks to Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages, couples all over the world have been able to analyze how they give and receive love. In this article, we’re going to be talking about the physical touch love language, and it’s not all about sex! Physical touch, such as hugs and cuddles, releases the feel-good hormone oxytocin and can even boost your immunity—all the more reason to snuggle up to your beau or sweetheart. If you love to be close to your partner and crave their warm hugs, your love language might just be physical touch. If your way of showing your partner you love them is a caress or a kiss, your love language might be physical touch.
Signs your love language is physical touch
- You’re a ‘touchy’ person; you love to cuddle, snuggle, kiss, and caress your partner.
- You feel loved when your partner wants to be physically close to you, hug you, kiss you, etc.
- You might feel rejected when your partner doesn’t express love through touch.
- You love to hold hands in public.
- When you’re stressed out, there’s nothing better than your partner’s hugs or caresses.
- Your partner doesn’t have to say ‘I love you to make you feel loved.
Sex vs physical touch love language
Just because someone’s love language is physical touch doesn’t mean that they’re all about sex. However, they might value sex as a way to connect to their partner. By the same token, just because someone’s love language is not physical touch doesn’t mean that they don’t value sex or want to have a lot of sex. Most of the ways someone with a physical love language likes to express and receive love are actually non-intimate.
Ways to express love with non-intimate physical touch
Although non-intimate touch can lead to intimacy, it doesn’t have to. Some of the best ways you can be physically close to your partner are through non-intimate physical touch, such as sitting close to each other on the couch, hugging, touching their hair, rubbing their back, and even play fighting!
Tips for expressing love through physical touch
- Spontaneity: It’s great having a partner who understands how you receive love and acts on it. It’s even better when they do it spontaneously! Next time they’re doing the dishes, wrap your arms around them and kiss their neck and shoulders. When they’re lying on you on the couch, take the opportunity to run your fingers through their hair or rub their back. If they’re resting their feet on you, give them a foot massage. Be creative!
- Ask your partner what they like: If you and your partner have different love languages, it can be difficult to know what they specifically like within their love language. So if in doubt, ask them! If your partner has the physical touch love language, ask them what their favorite physical touches are. They might love cuddling but hate being massaged. Everyone is different!
- Don’t overdo it: Just because someone’s love language is physical touch, you don’t have to make that the only love language between you. Your partner might love physical touch, but they might also appreciate a few words of affirmation now and again. Mix it up.
- Be Genuine: Be genuine as you provide your partner with physical showcases of your love and affection. Don’t just hold them because you think you have to hold them, but hold them because deep down, you want to feel their body and soul closer to yours. Trust us; if your partner’s love language is the physical touch love language, they will easily be able to differentiate between genuine and non-genuine physical affection.
“Help! My love language is physical touch, but my partner’s isn’t!”
If this is you, don’t be concerned. Everybody is different, so it’s actually more likely that your partner will have a different love language than you than have the same one. The theory of The Five Love Languages is a great tool to use to find out how you both give and receive love, to understand your partner more and what they need. So by knowing that your love language is physical touch, your partner can adjust how they express love to you. Sometimes it can take some adjusting when you’re not used to expressing love in a certain way. But if your partner really cares about you and wants your relationship to work out, they will want to make you feel loved in the way you feel love.
How to work out your love language …
- Go to www.5lovelanguages.com
- Do The Love Language™ Quiz to find out your love language. The result will show a percentage for all the love languages. The highest one is your main love language. But take note of the other ones. It can be an interesting combination!
- Read up on your love language. If doing this as a couple, it’s best to do the quiz together and read up on each other’s love languages together.
- Use your results to be mindful in how you express love in your relationship.
Final word …
Knowing your partner’s love language is key to making them feel loved and understanding them on a deep level. It might also prevent a misunderstanding or two! If you or your partner’s love language is physical touch, remember that this doesn’t just mean sexual intimacy. It can be anything from sitting close to each other on the couch to kissing to spontaneously hugging your partner. The key to getting it right is communicating with your partner. If there is something specific that makes you feel loved, tell your partner. So many arguments occur in relationships due to partners assuming that their partner can read their minds. But this is no science fiction movie. How can your partner know how you feel loved if you don’t tell them? Stop assuming your partner knows how to express love to you and do The Five Love Languages Quiz! You won’t regret it!