We probably all learned how to masturbate without toys in our formative years, but it’s hard to go back once you’ve had some of the fantastic sex toys on the market today. But there are certainly perks to masturbation without sex toys. When we don’t use tools, we may be more in touch with how our bodies feel, be better able to verbalize what feels good to a partner, and have longer, more fulfilling masturbation sessions. Plus, it can make the toys that much more thrilling when they come back into the picture. 

To get back into the practice of doing it without the assistance of a vibrator, you’ll have to do some re-learning how to masturbate without toys. So put that vibrator back in the drawer, and let’s try it the good old-fashioned way!

Take your time. 

It’s just a fact that it’s just going to take longer when you’re learning how to masturbate without sex toys. Knowing this before you go into it can save you some of the frustration and self-doubt along the way. Start by simply blocking off an extended period of time to try out your new masturbation without toys techniques. Close the blinds, send the kids away to grandma’s, make sure your significant other is at work- do what you need to do to score yourself some real extended alone time. 

When you’re ready to indulge in some masturbation without toys, think slow, and then go even slower. In fact, it may help to take an orgasm off the table for the first 20 minutes at least. By giving yourself the time to really enjoy all of your body, you’ll be more able to get used to alternative forms of pleasuring yourself. The best way to masturbate without toys is to enjoy the journey and the destination. Orgasms are great, but getting used to enjoying the experience prior to the orgasm is a big reason a lot of people try to learn how to masturbate without sex toys. 

Notice other parts of your body.

This is the time to notice other parts of your body that sometimes sex toys aren’t good at handling. Sure, there’s a great number of sex toys out there for your clit, but there’s none perfectly designed to rub your hips in a way that feels good. When you’re re-learning how to masturbate without sex toys, you give yourself an excellent opportunity to use more of your body than you typically do.  

Try out your hands, stomach, thighs, and arms. Treat yourself with sensual massage oil, or just let yourself enjoy the way your own body feels. The best way to masturbate without toys is ultimately to really listen to the entirety of your body and treat it kindly. Make sure to place a little added focus on those erogenous zones– it’ll go a really long way. 

Be kind to your body. 

A big reason many women end up using sex toys is that they minimize interaction with the rest of their bodies. If you want to know how to masturbate without sex toys- a big part of that is letting your body feel good without your own self-consciousness getting in the way. Being embarrassed about how your body feels or what you may look like may have you racing to the finish line and wanting to use a toy. 

If you’re still struggling to love your body while you’re learning how to masturbate without sex toys, try turning off the lights or getting under the covers. Sometimes strategies like this can let us check back into how our bodies are feeling more than how they’re looking. The best way to masturbate without sex toys is truly getting in touch with your body in ways you maybe haven’t for a while. 

Cheat a little bit. 

Listen, there’s a whole lot of different ways how to masturbate without sex toys that are still on the table. Just because you’re trying to do it without a vibrator or your trusty G spot dildo doesn’t mean you’re empty-handed. Pillows, blankets, and even clothing or furniture are on the table. “But how?” you might ask. The answer? Dry humping. 

Dry humping is simply a lost art. Essentially it’s just grinding your most sensitive areas into something that feels good. If you’ve forgotten this magic recipe for pleasure, try to find something that allows for some resistance. While soft blankets and pillows are a fun tease, you may find more orgasmic success with something firmer. And don’t be worried about what you look like, you’re alone. When you’re learning how to masturbate without toys, it’s ok to experiment with other forms of pleasure. 

Try it Guided. 

If you’re still stuck, another valuable option is the world of guided masturbation. Essentially, it’s another person there with you via audio to walk you through the process. If it’s been challenging for you so far to learn how to masturbate without sex toys, guided meditation can help. It’ll feel like someone is there with you, walking you through the ways you can make your body feel good. When you’re ready, you can even go for it without the headphones. As you listen, learn the strategies the narrator is sharing with you to try out on your own. 

Guided masturbation is also available in video format. This video format may give you some helpful visuals if you’re learning about your body and how it feels for the first time. Some of the best even break down different types of touch for you. By doing it through the means of guided masturbation, you’ll be able to not just learn for yourself how to masturbate without sex toys but also different ways for your partner to touch your body. 

Go Pro with Hands Free

Ok, if you’ve tried all of the above and are successfully handling masturbation without sex toys, it’s time to level up. Beyond just how to masturbate without sex toys, you’re going to want to try and master the truly hands-free orgasm. Before you’re ready to jump into this, it’s smart if you already feel capable of orgasming sans toys. If you thought learning how to masturbate without a sex toy was a challenge, this can be an even more challenging proposition. And that’s ok- like everything, it’s good to have goals. 

Hands-free masturbation is a special flex, to be sure. And while you may not immediately be successful in getting yourself to orgasm, it’s a great way to continue engaging with your body without external stimuli. It can be incredibly empowering to have that much control over your sexuality. Essentially a truly hands-free orgasm is mastering both your own kegel muscles and your own tantric sexual energy. Neither of those is easy, but it’s certainly fun to challenge ourselves sexually. 

And as always, although there might be a challenge, have fun with the journey and never take a moment of your physical pleasure for granted. Feeling good is what life is all about, after all. 

And there you have it, the steps for taking the sex toys out of your self-sex. Masturbation without sex toys is possible for nearly everyone. And while mastering how to masturbate without sex toys is great, remember that it’s still OK to indulge in high-quality sex toys when you want to. A good challenge and learning to love your body is one thing; depriving yourself of sexual gratification is just unkind. By striking the perfect balance between masturbation with toys and masturbation without toys- you’ll create a sex life that is both empowering AND fruitful.