How to Deal with Sexual Frustration.

Oct 15, 2021

If you’ve ever struggled with sexual frustration and have tried to find the answer to how to deal with sexual frustration, look no further! We at V for Vibes are here to tell you precisely what you want to know – and we think it’s a great step in your journey to be seeking the answer to the question that so deeply affects your life and relationships with others. 

We’ve put together a number of different strategies you can adopt towards discovering the many answers of how to deal with sexual frustration and combating the negative emotions that can come out of it.

It’s actually pretty common and is ‘normal’ to feel, and surprisingly a lot of people don’t know where to begin when it comes to it, given that it’s so common. There is no shame in feeling and experiencing sexual frustration, and we’d just like a moment to remind you of that. It’s heartening to have more and more conversations about this and find ways to deal with it together, like a community that aims for more empowered individuals who have more empowered sex. 

Sexual frustration can have profound impacts on your relationship with yourself and others around you – it can make you bitter, upset, quick to anger, grumpy, and downright frustrated with how you’re feeling. It isn’t pleasant and isn’t easy to acknowledge, but it is important to talk about it so that we can move closer to addressing the issue at hand. Here are a few steps that can help you learn how to deal with sexual frustration: 

Communicate! 

This can be very difficult and is often very emotionally taxing, but communicating with your partner when you are experiencing sexual frustration is one of the best ways to deal with it. To begin, ensure that a safe and comfortable environment has been created where you and your partner can openly share thoughts and ideas about it and then bring it up whenever you’re ready. Tell them truly how you feel and how you would like them to help you find a way through this. Tell them you genuinely need their support to get through this and are hoping for changes. Come up with a plan together so that you and your partner can have the best outcome in this situation, and everyone can feel satisfied in one way or another. But remember, bad communication practices can lead to even more frustration, so please take the time to learn how to communicate better in a relationship for success in your talking endeavors, and always practice effective listening on the other side of things so that communication is not a one-sided ordeal. 

how to deal with sexual frustration

Keep an Open Heart and Mind 

When you begin to engage in sex talk regarding the complications and the lack of fulfillment when it comes to your sex life, it might be a painful conversation to have. Remember that you are telling someone that you are experiencing negative emotions towards a vulnerable and intimate act like sex and sexual encounters, and that being kind and gentle about it is the best way to deal with it. 

Reflect upon any suggestions that your partner may come up with and devise a plan to combat the negative emotions it can bring up, and work towards making it better for the both of you. This is going to be a difficult process for both of you, and your support and kindness to each other will mean a lot and make it easier than it usually is. 

Exercise 

If you’re finding it difficult to have the conversation come to a conclusive end – because sometimes you just don’t know where to start, and that’s okay – you can choose to take a different approach. The alternate route to dealing with sexual frustration can have a more physical and rooted in the body experience and can encourage you to exercise and move as much as you can. 

Not surprisingly, one of the greatest ways to truly revive feeling desire and attraction again is when you feel physically fit and good about yourself, and what better way to do that than to get in as much movement as possible. Yoga, working out, biking, swimming, or dancing, any number of options are available to you to really work out all of that pent-up energy that can be a result of sexual frustration. 

Getting all of it out through physical exertion is a great idea, especially for those who struggle to articulate their complex emotions verbally, and can help you relax and get some feel-good hormones going! When endorphins are released after a workout, an intense surge of happiness is felt – a very rewarding way of feeling good about your body and yourself. 

ben wa balls

Find Things to Keep You Busy 

This might be the perfect time to find out what you’re interested in. Take the opportunity to explore your desires, likes, and dislikes, and really keep yourself busy with new adventures. Perhaps try out new things like riding a bike or going for a swim, or even taking classes on things you’ve wanted to learn, like woodworking or clay workshops. 

Find new ways to entertain yourself in a manner that excites you and brings you joy and relief. It’ll also help you divert your attention from the negative emotions you are experiencing and will help your body release those feel-good hormones that can be the mood booster you need. A good spinning class can do the trick, too, so don’t be afraid to really experiment with whatever is available to you! 

We know of the importance of experiential intimacy with a partner, but it is also essential that you give yourself experiences to live for, as well!

Get Back in Touch With your Body 

Oftentimes, sexual frustration is a result of a lack of feeling or sensation, but it can also be a sort of displaced feeling where you don’t quite feel in touch with your body. Life-changing events that can result in depressive episodes can trigger a moment of feeling out of touch and not fully experiencing the intensity of the emotions or sensations available to you throughout your day. 

This numbing of sensations and feelings can build up to a point where you can experience sexual frustration without being able to identify it. This can result in bitterness and other negative emotions. One great way of dealing with it is practicing mindfulness and really taking some time off to meditate and relax. 

Getting back in touch with your body isn’t just a physical process; it’s mental and spiritual, too. It requires simulating your mind enough, inculcating mindful practices in your everyday life, taking a few moments every day to reflect upon yourself and your day, and it can make a world of difference! 

Seek Professional Help 

Sexual frustration can be very complicated and a difficult process to go through. It can leave you feeling low and empty and can really induce some harmful effects on your relationships with others and yourself and is a serious issue that needs to be addressed. 

If you have tried the strategies we have listed above and nothing seems to work, give talking to a professional a shot! This can be difficult since it requires vulnerability and honesty, and openness, but trust us, seeking professional help can be very rewarding in this process. 

A professional sex therapist can help equip you with the tools you need to deal with sexual frustration in more tangible and concrete ways curated especially for you that are highly personalized and meant to target your issues in particular. Seeking therapy is not a bad thing, despite the shame and stigma attached to it, and it can, in fact, help you get back in touch with your body and feel better about yourself, allowing you to have healthier and better relationships in your life!

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