Uncovering who we are as sexual beings is something that takes time, experience, and discovery. From manifesting in your imagination to being carried during your lovemaking, the process of understanding your personal kinks and how to address them in a sexual setting will result in a much more heightened level of fulfillment and satisfaction versus shying away from them.
And yes, there are a million different forms or paths of this that we may choose to take, and they all vary in the things that they provide. From simple yet orgasm altering sex toys to leather suits and anything in between, if you are in the beginning stages of really uncovering your inner freak in the sheets, then it can surely feel weird or intimidating.
But don’t worry, the wonderful news is that you’ve taken the right steps in at least determining that the pursuit of your kinks is something you feel as though is beneficial to your sex life, because it is, and we’re going to get into a few different ways in which you can first address how to be freaky with sex and provide to both yourself and your partner newfound satisfactions.
Talk with Your Partner
If you’ve asked yourself how to be freaky with sex, well guess what, nearly every other human being has as well! With that being said, your partner is a wonderful place to start in this discovery.
Talking to them will, first of all, create a necessary comfort. If you’re going to be trying new things, it’s in both of your interests to make them aware of this, as you don’t want to do anything that is out of their comfort zone either.
But more important than that is the fact that they are probably going to find excitement in this topic, and that this conversation will build trust around this dual discovery and ensure that things are catered to the health and safety of yourself and your relationship.
Your partner will also have valuable insight as to their own bedroom wishes, and by talking about different ways in which you might want to be freaky with sex, they can also speak on and address their own personal desires as well for mutual satisfaction across the board.
Make Sex Unconventional
One of the best methods of how to make sex freaky is to not focus on what you can do during sex, but instead where you can have sex. A simple change of place is wonderful because nothing has to change about the intercourse, and the only thing that has to change is the location!
When you lock into a sex routine, which is all too easy at becoming slightly repetitive, you might not realize it but the quality is probably dwindling! Because not only is it easy to become repetitive, it is also easy to get used to the repetitiveness and not realize that you may be missing out.
Instead of having sex in the bedroom, try having sex somewhere a little more unconventional. The kitchen, the shower, or even the car if you’re feeling extra adventurous.
And as well as a different location, also have sex at different times throughout the day! Don’t only have sex in the kitchen, but have a quicky in the kitchen before work to throw your partner a wild surprise and start both of your days off in the best of ways. Just have a little fun and change things up, and with this, you will initiate the beginnings of being more freaky with sex.
Explore Introductory BDSM
BDSM has been gaining popularity due to destigmatization across Hollywood and books, but the real reason as to why people are beginning to realize that this is a sexual kink that they very much enjoy is really because hey; it’s enjoyable as all hell!
And no, you don’t need whips and chains to add a little bit of BDSM spice to the recipe of your relationship. Instead, BDSM can be approached with introductory techniques that very much up the freak without taking things too far. And when you’re ready for the next level, you will have the experience and know-how required to further discover it.
For introductory BDSM as a means of answering how to be freaky with sex, you should first begin by establishing a dominant and submissive relationship with your partner. You can switch this around different times you have sex, but for each singular session, you should maintain the set role.
Start with slight bossing around and telling your partner exactly what they have to do, as they are forced to listen. You can play around with bits of restraint with introductory knots or handcuffs, and you can also incorporate sensory deprivation techniques such as placing a blindfold over their eyes.
Another aspect of BDSM is the enjoyment of providing and receiving pain. To begin experimenting with this, just start with light bits of choking or gagging with your fingers. You can spank their butt or lightly smack their cheeks, and use this relationship to make sex a little rougher.
Eventually, you will learn whether you enjoy being the reciprocator of the pain or the provider, and with that, you can adjust your dominant and submissive status accordingly.
Incorporate Sex Toys Into your Sex
Sex toys don’t just have to be for solo satisfaction, and there are so many incredible toys out there in existence that all aim to enhance couple play. If you want to know how to be freaky with sex, then sex toys will provide you newfound feelings that can only be discovered when you choose to use them in conjunction with the pleasures of your partner.
The simple truth is that humans simply cannot replicate the feelings of a sex toy! Our tongues cannot vibrate a clitoris as fast and as invigoratingly as a vibrator can, and there’s literally no way around this. So why not choose to then take advantage of what these toys can do at making for thigh shaking orgasms?
Sex toys are also one of the best ways to begin experimenting with multiple partner roleplay. Using a big, bulging dildo or a pocket pussy can make for a ‘shared’ partner type of experience that does not cross any limits and that you might find to be a kink of which really turns you on. Also, things like nipple clamps or a butt plug can make sure that all your erogenous zones are taken care of even when your partner can not reach them.
There is a nearly infinite world of beautiful sex toys out there that are all ready to make your sex better, and the best way to begin exploring is to just begin! Start with one, most likely that of which you consistently use during your solo play, and figure out what you like as you progress and add to your now-growing collection.
As much as sex is about physicality, the mind has almost an equal effect as to what it does to fulfilling our deepest desires, as sex is also extremely mental.
To cater to the imagination and this mental side of sex, dirty talk is an excellent means to do so and that is another integrated aspect of how to be freaky with sex.
The best part about dirty talk is that there’s never a bad time to do it. Shoot your partner a kinky message while they are away or at work to build anticipation, as anticipation does nothing but make sex better.
When they get home, tease them with your words and entice them into craving you until they absolutely cannot take it. And when the clothes come off, don’t stop there, as there’s still plenty to say while you ride them or while you direct them on how to eat you out as you continue to use dirty talk to your freaky advantage.
As with all things, if you’re new to dirty talk just start slow! No one expects an erotic literature author, and even the most cliche or simple of kinky sentences can provide a world of pleasure to your mind, so don’t think that your words won’t be enough, and with practice, you will surely become more apt at using your voice as a means to drive the kinky, nasty and riveting sex we all want and love.