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What is Fingering & How to Do it Well- A Guide to Hands-On Sex.

Fingering is the fabled art of bringing a woman to orgasm by only using your fingers. It is a delicate and incredibly hot process at its best, and incredibly annoying and uncomfortable at its worst. Fingering is not for everyone, but let us traverse the wide chasm of history together and learn a little bit more about fingering sex.

What is fingering?

Fingering, as the name implies, is the act of stimulating the other person’s genitals by only using your fingers. 

The act has been around for a long, long time, but it is yet unknown who actually discovered this enticingly raunchy act and whether or not she or he was aware of the fact that the clitoris is 2/3 times more sensitive than the penis

But whoever this person was, the whole world owes them a debt of gratitude, as so much sexual pleasure has been derived from this passionately sexual act.

Fingering is near-ubiquitous with sex. It has gone by many names, including by not limited to finger banging, manual sex, digital sex, etc. 

To some, fingering sex is usually initiated to stimulate the female genitalia or the anus as a form of foreplay, while to others, it is sexual activity in itself to enhance your partner’s or your pleasure, as some can even reach orgasm with just fingering alone. It is widely used throughout the world as a substitute for sex and as foreplay.

When done right, fingering is the perfect way to stimulate the female genitals, as the fingers are much more flexible than a penis and the dexterity of the fingers usually means that a person can help their female partner achieve a G-spot orgasm, a doubly difficult milestone to achieve during sex, or to simply warm up and self lubricate before progressing to more. 

The Grafenberg spot, or G-spot, is a highly sensitive area on the front wall of the vagina. Most people enjoy contact with the area, while others don’t find it especially pleasurable. The G-spot has been the subject of much controversy, and the jury is still out whether or not it actually exists. Scientists have not yet made up their minds and the debate still rages on.

Regardless of what scientists say, however, there’s something special that occurs there with a delicate movement of the fingers, and this simply can’t be argued. 

And speaking of passionate sex, some people also enjoy or prefer anal finger play and stimulation of the anus

The anus, like the vagina and clitoris, has multiple nerve endings, making this a wondrous experience to play around with.

It is with these nerve endings that anal fingering can add extreme amounts of additional pleasure in conjunction with vaginal or penile play, and reports of some of the most euphoric orgasms are those that involve anal fingering. 

While fingering is traditionally an act done by the males for the females to a vagina, some men do enjoy anal fingering as well.

Anal fingering in men stimulates the prostate (the prostate is a gland that could be described as a male G-spot), and in fact, they can even achieve an orgasm this way.

Now that we have gotten the nitty-gritty stuff out of the way, let us move to the how of fingering, because hey, let’s face it; odds are everyone sees fingering in their future, and you might as well be good at it!

 

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Here is all you need to know about fingering sex:

Wash your hands

Before anything happens, always wash your hand.

How do I get things going?

You may be in the mood, but your partner may still require a little more foreplay. So, before you begin, gauge your partner’s level of arousal. You should try kissing, neck kissing, nipple play, etc, to get your partner in the mood before heading south.

Position

The position depends on you and your partner. The missionary position is a time and tested position, but you and your partner can also do doggy-style. The spooning position is another great position, or even think to try standing and kneeling. 

The position you choose should go hand in hand with your level of comfort. If one particular position feels great, then stick to it! At least until it is time to explore further. 

 

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Anticipation.

Anticipation can either be your best friend or your worst enemy, but in matters related to fingering, it pays to wait for just a little. You can use either your fingers or your knuckles to circle the area and build anticipation. Next, you should remove the bottoms and tease a little through the fabric of the panties before removing those as well.

Fingers

The number of fingers you use for the purpose of fingering your partner depends on your partner and her only. Each vulva owner has a different preference, and remember that it is better to start slowly before picking up the pace. Always try one finger before adding another and gauge discomfort based on body language. 

Set the pace

The general rule of fingering is that you should start off slowly. You should slide your fingers only 1 or 2 inches into the vagina and try to stimulate the G-Spot. 

If your partner prefers deeper manipulation, then you should insert your fingers further to better stimulate the A-spot or cervix, performing a ‘come here’ motion with your fingers (palms facing up) to massage the orgasm-inducing area. 

If the person being fingered does not like the act, then you should take a moment to pause and converse about how you can make things better, as they will appreciate your trust to communicate. 

Body language

Body language and all the nonverbal cues are a big part of fingering. Be on the lookout for your partner’s hands and the rate of their breathing. You should also pay attention to whether or not your partner is shifting their hips towards you. These things can tell you a lot about whether or not your partner is into the sexual act. You should also try to lock eyes, using this as a touchless form of intimate embrace.

Lube

Lube is a godsend for fingering. A good amount of lube will make it much easier for your fingers to navigate her lay parts. Always remember when it comes to lube, slippery is good.

The Clit

The clitoris is the epicenter of pleasure for vulva owners. It is all about the clit. Most, if not all, females need clitoral stimulation to climax.

For maximum fingering pleasure, focus your attention equally on lightly pleasuring the clit through gentle massage as you do pleasuring the G-spot.

 

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Fun

Fingering is meant to be a fun activity for you and your partner. Most people take fingering way too seriously, and this can cause a form of intimidation that does no good for sex. 

It is a good idea to take a step back and enjoy it a little, and always remember to relax. 

Fingering sex safety and precautions

Fingering is a very low-risk sexual activity, but it does have a few risks. You should always take care when engaging in fingering, and you should always use safe practices. 

You should also keep in mind that it is possible to pass sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and other infections through fingering. Here are some tips:

  1. It is always a good idea to wash your hands. You never know what kind of germs lay there.
  2. If you and your partner engage in anal fingering; the one doing the fingering should not touch the vaginal canal after, or you can always wear rubber gloves
  3. The vulva and the anus are amazing creations, but always remember they are highly tender areas and have been created to be treated nicely. Both of them can get easily irritated. Always use lube and lots of it. You should also be mindful of your fingernails. They should be neat and trimmed before going into your partner’s vagina or Anus.

Fingering can seem deceptively simple but it is a complicated exercise. The pleasures you and your partner will feel from the exercise are directly proportional to your level of comfort. Each vulva is different as each person is different. 

The preference of one person in matters related to fingering might diverge widely from another person’s preference, and what works for one may simply not work for another. 

Once you and your partner are comfortable with breaking down any barriers, you can work together to discover exactly the ways in which one can induce intoxicating pleasure unto the other through this act, regardless of your gender. Because hey, fingering is fun for everyone when the environment is right!