What is Emotional Intimacy?

Sep 7, 2021

Emotional intimacy between two people – particularly those two in a relationship – is when you and your partner are comfortable enough to talk about feelings and emotions without fearing any backlash. Think of it as a safe space of sorts. You and your partner must be free to share your emotions, thoughts, and feelings about any number of things and allow yourselves the space to have conversations that might be difficult elsewhere. Emotional intimacy is a sign of a solid relationship where trust and care are put at the forefront of all interactions between you and your partner. 

So if you’re here to find out what is emotional intimacy and how to build emotional intimacy with your partner, we’ve got you covered! At V for Vibes, we believe that it is absolutely crucial to have all levels of intimacy between partners to have a smooth, loving, and long-lasting relationship that leads to more intimate sex. Emotional intimacy can help you achieve that, and can add flavor to your sex life, too! Trust us; emotional intimacy can help you and your partner open up about so many things. It’s bound to make you have better sex with them. 

Emotional intimacy can help with so many more things aside from sex, too, including addressing the problems in your relationship, your own self-confidence, and self-esteem. It can boost your mood, too, especially in troubling times or when you’re undergoing a stressful situation, as it opens up a pathway for communication with your partner. 

emotional intimacy

How to Build Emotional Intimacy with your Partner

To build emotional intimacy, one of the first few things you require is an open heart and an open mind to differences. You might be met with difficulties, especially if your partner is not one to talk or communicate the issues they are having, but you will need to stay committed and not let obstacles deter you from pursuing emotional intimacy.

Remember that this is just as much for you and the Self as it is for your partner and your relationship. The ability to connect with people on a level of emotional intimacy is important to build holistic and caring relationships that allow you to feel like your best Self. 

Besides that, cultivating space for emotional intimacy in your relationship will also help your partner feel more at peace discussing issues and problems with you, a wonderful asset in increasing sex drive

To begin, assess whether you and your partner communicate honestly, effectively, and with care for each other. If you do, then you’re already on the path towards establishing emotional intimacy in your relationship, and that’s a reason to celebrate! The next few steps will include things like allowing yourself to be vulnerable around your partner; this means that you will have to let your guard down, even if that means giving up some of the control over your circumstances. 

This has to work both ways; remember that emotional intimacy is a two-way street and that you and your partner both will have to willingly commit to this for a better relationship. 

If, however, you find yourself at a point where you and your partner do not communicate openly, honestly, and with care, you might have to begin at an earlier stage in the process of building emotional intimacy. Begin by sharing your emotions, needs, and feelings openly and effectively. Help your partner understand how to be there for you, and ask how you can be there for them when they need support. You will have to ask your partner to do the same. Both of you need to talk openly and be willing to share intimate details, even about things that make you uncomfortable (such as your sexual kinks) – that’s what emotional intimacy at its core is.

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Why Emotional Intimacy Matters

Emotional intimacy is important for a number of reasons, not just in terms of a healthy relationship. Of course, one of the biggest perks of being able to create emotional intimacy in your relationship is that you will be able to talk to your partner without any hesitation. This can be about any topic – from mundane things like your day to more personal things like insecurities, past experiences, and hurt that you have felt in an earlier relationship.

Part of emotional intimacy is also to be able to receive news or be on the receiving end of a conversation that suggests you are causing hurt, whether it’s intentional or not. You need to be willing to change your attitude and actions if your partner comes to you with a problem they have with regards to how you deal with things in the relationship. 

Emotional intimacy is also a great starting point to begin addressing some of your long-standing issues. One of the prerequisites to emotional intimacy is that you allow yourself to be vulnerable and let go of that fear of hurt and rejection that you hold on to so dearly. Of course, this is very difficult and has to come with lots of practice and hope, but this has very high rewards. 

Keep in mind that the rewards are more intimate sex, a deeper connection with your partner, and a more meaningful way of interacting with those you love. 

Additionally, your increased sense of Self and better self-esteem might help you feel more at peace with your body, resulting in better sex! You can take this form of a higher self-esteem everywhere you go – not just in your relationship, but in your meetings at work, with clients, and in general, it helps you assert your boundaries with more ease.

Examples of Emotional Intimacy 

Examples of emotional intimacy can include sharing feelings that are both negative and positive, talking about your day and sharing any unpleasant parts of it with your partner, and sharing stories from your past you may have boxed away or repressed to help your partner understand your actions better. 

One example can be when your partner gets home from work, and you two sit down to talk; you can ask your partner if there were any particular parts of their day they would like to share even if they are not great or were unpleasant in the moment.

Or if you get home from work and have had an unpleasant interaction with someone at the store, or the bus station, or at the office, you should be ready and willing to share it with your partner. In either case, be willing to reciprocate with intimate details and be open to listening and supporting your partner as best as you can. Remember that it is vital to have those conversations where you find out how your partner needs support, whether it’s through words of affirmation, physical touch, or acts of service

emotional intimacy

Strategies to Get You Started 

Some things that can help you build emotional intimacy with your partner and achieve intimate sex eventually are:

  1. Patience: Patience is the key to many things, including emotional and other forms of intimacy. When your partner shares a distressing moment in their lives with you, be kind and gentle, and patient before anything else.
  2. Be careful about your reactions: Keep care and love at the center of all your reactions and responses. If your partner is sharing something difficult with you, let them know you are there to support them in any way they want. 
  3. Share: When it comes to you, listening is not the only role to take on. Be willing to share your own stories and details of your lives with your partner – listening and talking are both critical for building emotional intimacy.

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